Leaving Marko’s

I’m sitting on the terrace, waiting to go down to the yard by the lower house for breakfast. This will be my last time to sit here, at least on this trip. As I write that I think of my friend and her cancer diagnosis and being told a month ago she likely has 8-12 months to live. I imagine doing everything as if it might be my last time. Not infrequently I do live that way, being present in the moment with gratitude and not thinking ahead to the future. But I also frequently don’t live that way. Often I am thinking about ‘getting through’ whatever I’m doing so I can get on to the next thing. I do this especially when I’m nervous or scared, like when we drive on winding narrow roads here. I do manage to enjoy the sights and scenery but part of me is clamped tight just hoping to get to our destination safely. Sometimes I am able to let go of my futile attempts at controlling my fate and I do relax fully, but this requires choosing to do so. My default is to tense up as if that will somehow protect me from unwanted experiences.

Back to the balcony, now. I love watching the valley in front of me light up as the morning sun slowly makes its way over the ridge top behind me. Watching the ways the light continually changes the colors, shadows and shapes before me is so much more satisfying than watching tv. I like that the scene changes slowly but perceptibly, wherever I am. Then there are all the details to notice. Just now a ‘great tit’ bird landed briefly on the terrace a few feet away. We’ve been enjoying identifying some of the birds we hear here, using the Merlin app. Some people are bird watchers. I am more of a bird listener because my eyesight is not great. Even when I can’t see all the birds I’m hearing it seems somehow respectful to acknowledge them via their sounds. I used to just hear birds and think, ‘birds’. Now I pay attention to the many different bird sounds I hear instead of lumping birds into an amorphous category. I don’t like it when people lump all humans together as if we are all the same, and I don’t want to view birds or other creatures that way either. 

Speaking of creatures, I haven’t written about butterflies on this trip. We have seen a lot, but maybe not quite as many as we have seen on other trips, although I think we have been seeing more since being in Montenegro. We have also seen dozens and dozens of lizards everywhere we have been. Seeing them makes me happy. I like how they can be totally relaxed in one moment then dart away into cracks and crevices the next. I am grateful we have not seen any snakes on this trip. Anytime I walk anywhere other than a sidewalk I keep a lookout for them. This region has several very poisonous snakes. They aren’t aggressive or out to attack people, but if you happen to surprise them and are too close for them to slither away they can bite you. I’d prefer to avoid that. 

I haven’t talked about them as much as I did last year but we have encountered dozens of stray dogs and cats just about every place we’ve been. Just last night as we turned onto our little road to walk home a dog we’ve seen several times looked at us and started trotting in front of us, turning his head every minute or so to make sure we were following. Shortly before we reached Marco’s place the dog slowed down and entered the yard of a place where either he lives or people know and like him. 

We’ve also encountered lots of roosters, chickens, sheep, cows and goats, including a herd of about 40 walking with their shepherd on the little-traveled main road between the city of Niš and Trebinje where we are tonight.

Later…

We ate breakfast down in the yard again, then had a leisurely visit with Marko before packing the car and heading toward Trebinje. Marko is tired at this time of year. Yesterday was the first day since April that he took a day off so he could go on an excursion with friends. He hopes next year to change what he is doing so he can have a more reasonable schedule (he has said this every time we have been here). His idea is to rent out the place for retreats every other week and have the other weeks off. He could charge more for retreats and make a similar amount of money but work half as much. He is thinking ahead to being married and having children. He wants to be able to spend time with the kids. He also intends to stop leading hiking trips for another guy. It takes too much time and he doesn’t get paid enough, and sometimes the people he guides are not good to be around yet he is stuck with them. A couple weeks ago he took some people on a 6 hour hike and nobody asked him a single question about anything.

We found out that his property is in the national park. After asking him how that works, whether they lease the land or own it, as best we can tell, he owns the land but because it is designated as being within the park there are tight restrictions about what can be built. The park has red, yellow and green zones which dictate what can be done in each area. These restrictions have gotten even tighter with the newer government and are being enforced more than in the past. He is happy about this.

His uncle, who is very rich, is building a winery and guest house by the road below Marko’s property. It will be aesthetically in keeping with the old local style but it will be bigger than Marko likes. His uncle is very rich but is a good guy. He is also responsible for building a large ugly modern hotel right in the center of Virpazar. That building is not in keeping with the environment at all. Marko does not like it (nor do we). When we asked about a huge house we saw on the hillside on our hike the other day he said it was built and is owned by an Italian criminal (implying mafia). He said in order to build his house there he had to promise he would not do anything illegal in Montenegro. Supposedly he stole all the money he wanted already and is not still active in that way. Marko has met the guy and said he is very nice and proper and you would never know from an incidental meeting that he was a criminal. His uncle is friends with the guy.

Marko grew up on his property but had to move to Podgorica when he was in high school because Virpazar only has an elementary school. He has an apartment there and his fiancée lives there but even in the off season he comes to his property every 2-3 days not only for upkeep but because he ‘must’ for his soul’s sake. He has made so many improvements to his land over the past ten years, including planting many trees. He enjoys learning about plants. Basically he enjoys learning about almost anything. He is truly a renaissance man, and as a host he could not be better. He is a perfectionist by nature, a bit ‘type A’, and strives to serve his guests as best he can, even those who are picky, unreasonable and not very nice (fortunately the ‘bad’ guests are not too common).

He has noticed that his guests have changed in recent years. Initially people came for just a couple nights and used his place as a base from which to run around and see things. Now more people are staying longer and instead of rushing about they just lie in the hammock or sit in the terrace all day. Marko thinks this reflects a world trend of people being too rushed, stressed and burned out. This is why he would like to shift his focus to retreats.

Marko’s dad is an electrician, his mom bought a fish restaurant last year by the lake. One sister has a boat and runs boat tours (and has a new baby). Another sister has a couple cottages on the property next door that she rents out. 

We touched on politics and the state of the world. Like almost all young people he thinks Vucic is terrible. He didn’t say what he thinks of the Montenegrin leaders but in general he thinks most politicians are bad. He is very disturbed by the recent events in Israel. He does not condone violence as a way of solving problems but understands the hopelessness that Palestinians feel that might lead to their aggressive acts. He feels equally bad for the Israeli and Palestinian people, and again blames the politicians and leaders for exacerbating the problems.

In the off season Marko likes to play tennis, read, and travel. He continues to study Arabic. He and his fiancée will spend a month in Viet Nam. 

When it was time for us to leave we bought a bottle of the family’s wine and he gave us a small bottle of their grape rakija. He said how happy he was that we came to stay there again. He views us as friends and said if ever we want to come in the off season we can stay for free. That is a little bit tempting….

Photos: Row 1: Rajka, our former host who lives up the road. Far right- in town-the rectangular shape is the new ugly hotel. Row 2: view of Skadar lake in the distance, an old house, the all-pervasive karađorđeva šnicla- a pounded pork covered with cheese and ham, rolled, breaded and fried. Row 3: dog escorting us home, old boat in Marko’s yard, breakfast. Row 4-5: Marko’s and his wine cellar. Far left- the only way in and out of town is this one lane passage between 2 buildings. Row 6: driving away from Skadar lake.